备考2024届高考英语一轮复习第二部分读后续写专题二热考话题素材5温馨家庭

这是一份备考2024届高考英语一轮复习第二部分读后续写专题二热考话题素材5温馨家庭，共3页。

[2021新高考Ⅰ]A MOTHER’S DAY SURPRISE
The twins were filled with excitement as they thught f the surprise they were planning fr Mther’s Day. Hw pleased and prud Mther wuld be when they brught her breakfast in bed. They planned t make French tast and chicken prridge. They had watched their mther in the kitchen. There was nthing t it. Jenna and Jeff knew exactly what t d.
The big day came at last. The alarm rang at 6 a.m. The pair went dwn the stairs quietly t the kitchen. They decided t bil the prridge first. They put sme rice int a pt f water and left it t bil while they made the French tast. Jeff brke tw eggs int a plate and added in sme milk. Jenna fund the bread and put tw slices int the egg mixture. Next， Jeff turned n the secnd stve burner t heat up the frying pan. Everything was ging smthly until Jeff started frying the bread. The pan was t ht and the bread turned black within secnds. Jenna threw the burnt piece int the sink and put in the ther slice f bread. This time， she turned dwn the fire s it cked nicely.
Then Jeff nticed steam shting ut f the pt and the lid starting t shake. The next minute， the prridge biled ver and put ut the fire. Jenna panicked. Thankfully， Jeff stayed calm and turned ff the gas quickly. But the stve was a mess nw. Jenna tld Jeff t clean it up s they culd cntinue t ck the rest f the prridge. But Jeff’s hand tuched the ht burner and he gave a cry f pain. Jenna made him put his hand in cld water. Then she caught the smell f burning. Oh dear！ The piece f bread in the pan had turned black as well.
As the twins lked arund them in disappintment， their father appeared.
The twins carried the breakfast upstairs and wke their mther up.
1.He lked at them， cnfused.
①用具体的神态描写替换笼统词cnfused，体现父亲的困惑。
He lked at them with a puzzled frwn n his face.
②为句①补充困惑的原因，并运用现在分词短语作状语，与上文形成较好的连贯。
Seeing the mess in the kitchen， he lked at them with a puzzled frwn n his face.
2.He cmfrted them and instructed them hw t ck.
①使用具体的肢体动作替换笼统词cmfrt。
He patted their shulders and instructed them hw t ck.
②运用副词体现父亲的包容和教他们做饭时的耐心。
He patted their shulders and instructed them hw t ck kindly and patiently.
③运用现在分词短语作状语改写句②，使句子结构更加错落有致，表达更亮眼。
He patted their shulders，instructing them hw t ck kindly and patiently.
3.She felt mved.
①利用具体的情感描写替代mved，让表达更加生动，使母亲的感动之情跃然纸上。
She felt a warm wave f happiness welling up in her heart.
②为句①增加具体的动作描写，更进一步凸显母亲的感动。
She felt a warm wave f happiness welling up in her heart，and almst shed tears.
③使用独立主格结构改写优化句②前半句。
A warm wave f happiness welling up in her heart， she almst shed tears.
Asthetwinslkedarundthemindisappintment，theirfatherappeared. Seeing the mess in the kitchen， he lked at them with a puzzled frwn n his face（满脸困惑，双眉紧锁）. They hurriedly explained what had happened，waiting fr his blame. T their surprise， their father just laughed and patted their shulders， instructing them hw t ck kindly and patiently. Everything ging smthly， sn a delicius breakfast was ready.
Thetwinscarriedthebreakfastupstairsandwketheirmtherup. The twins hugged her and yelled "Happy Mther’s Day， dear Mummy！" At the sight f（一看见……） the breakfast n the table，a warm wave f happiness welling up in her heart（一股幸福的暖流涌上心头）， the mther almst shed tears. She hugged the twins tightly， chking， "It is really a surprise t me. I am s prud f（为……感到骄傲） yu." They asked her t have a taste. She bit int a piece f the fried bread and said it was the best she had ever tasted. Hearing this， the twins were verjyed， with their eyes twinkling at their father， delight spreading thrugh the rm.人物
主要人物：the twins（Jenna and Jeff）；次要人物：their mther and father。根据原文中的描述"they thught f the surprise they were planning fr Mther’s Day"和"they brught her breakfast in bed"可以看出，双胞胎孝顺、懂得感恩。
场景
故事发生在母亲节当天早上，双胞胎为母亲做早餐，故原文故事情节的地点在家里的厨房。
情节及
情感线
双胞胎筹划在母亲节那天给母亲做早餐、制造惊喜（感到很兴奋）→准备早餐时，刚开始一切进展顺利（感到很自信）→面包糊了，粥溢出来了，Jeff烫伤了（惊慌失措）→续写第一段提示语，双胞胎慌乱失望时，父亲出现了（担心父亲责备）→续写第二段提示语，早餐做好，给母亲惊喜（满怀期待和兴奋）
主题
双胞胎要在母亲节早上为母亲做一顿早餐，"the surprise"体现了他们的意图，"Hw pleased and prud Mther wuld be"是他们希望看到的结果。再根据续写提示语可知，双胞胎在父亲的帮助下完成了惊喜早餐，因此文章最终应展现子女感恩父母，父母为子女感到骄傲和自豪，一家人其乐融融的温馨画面。
续写
第一段
本段主要描述"救星"父亲出场后的场景。根据首句提示语可知，接下来应该描述：父亲看到杂乱的厨房会有什么反应，会说什么或做什么。尾句衔接续写第二段提示语：在父亲的帮助下，双胞胎做好了早餐。因此中间应描写父亲了解原因、帮助双胞胎整理厨房和准备早餐等，侧重人物间的互动，强调动作、心理、表情描写。
续写
第二段
本段的故事场景在母亲的卧室，主要故事情节：双胞胎把母亲叫醒后，母亲对双胞胎准备的惊喜的反应和感受。本段应侧重人物动作、语言、心理描写。结尾部分要营造出一家人其乐融融，母慈子孝的画面。