2024年高考英语读后续写核心素养与实战演练 专题01 读后续写:冲突构思大法(原卷版+解析版)
展开如何通过矛盾设计来写好作文?
第一,矛盾冲突包括两种主要形式:一是外部冲突,包括人与人、人与周围环境的矛盾;二是内部冲突,指的是特定环境下人物自身的矛盾。
第二,如何设计矛盾冲突?从大的方向上说,它包括三个方面:人与人、人与周围环境、人物内心。从内容方面来说,这种矛盾冲突,是现实生活里由于人们的立场、观点、思想感情、理想愿望的不同而产生的矛盾斗争,是人们的主观与客观、正确与错误、先进与落后等种种矛盾斗争的反映。
在构思作文时,一般都会想到哪些矛盾冲突呢?
从立意的角度来说,矛盾冲突要指向人们的价值取向。比如生与死、是与非、成与败、诚与伪、忠与奸、善与恶、荣与辱、得与失、乐与苦、爱与恨、兴与衰、小我与大我、主观与客观……这是需要我们在写作之前想清楚的。
例子:下面这篇文章大意:感恩节到了, 我继续和往年一样, 这一天会开车送礼物如食物给穷人。但是有一年, 我和妻子呆在纽约的旅馆里, 不能回家团圆, 我告诉妻子我的往年的做法, 妻子非常开心。但我们需要货车(van)才能购物。于是我们准备在街头上拦一辆车, 妻子同意了。
文章凭什么吸引阅卷者的眼光,拿到高分的?一句话:矛盾设计精巧。
首先,是人与周围环境的矛盾。环境的恶劣:chilly wind,我们却在拦车,突出艰难。
(插一句:环境的描写,可以力求一个渐变的技巧,譬如在小说I survive里有一句:The wind maned at first. Then it started t hwl, and finally it was shrieking s ludly Dad had t turn up the TV.)
其次,是人与人的矛盾。纽约的街头,无人同情我们,更无人对我们道一声辛苦,大家似乎什么也没有看到。但最后我们还是看到了热心人,并且和我们一起去帮助他人。
最后,是人的内心冲突。从开始的充满希望到绝望:“Wh can we turn t?” my wife murmured with a fierce frwn…we fund urselves n the verge(边缘) f giving up到重新充满期待:The nearly-extinguished(快要熄灭的)sparks f hpe were instantly rekindled(点燃)
最后想说的是:虽然读后续写无非就是简单的故事讲述,但是我们还是可以融入一点人文主义情怀,这就是美学价值了。我在文章中用到了:Hwever, they came, they saw and they sped up, nly t leave ash and dirt dancing in the air. 和It was the wrst f times, but it was als the best f times. 当然这不是必须的,而是看平时的积累和那么一点点文学灵感的因素。
就为我们平时备考提供了线索。下面我来说说,其中各个冲突并非孤立的,而是相互交织,解决方法也是如此:
解决途径基本是:
1.encuragement(某人的鼓励的话)
2.cmfrt(某人的安慰)
3.inspiratin(突然灵机一动)
4.effrt(自己的努力训练)
5.calm(冷静思考)
6.kindness(某人的善良)
7.curage(勇敢做起来)
8.lve(爱心,不过这个需要和mve,patience结合,爱只是底子,还需要感化和耐心等待)
9.help(准确说是及时帮助)
这样划分后,我们就比较方便去针对性进行训练。下面且以高考真题为例进行说明:
模拟训练01
读后续写 阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。
Jhn Blanchard std up, straightened his army unifrm(制服), and studied the crwd making their way thrugh the statin. He lked fr the girl whse heart he knew, but whse face he had never seen, the girl with a rse.
His interest in her began thirteen mnths ag in a library. Taking a bk ff the shelf, he fund himself fascinated, nt with the wrds f the bk, but with the ntes penciled in the margin (页边的空白). The sft handwriting shwed a thughtful sul and brilliant mind. In the frnt f the bk, he discvered the wner's name, Miss Hllis Maynell. With time and effrt he fund her address. She lived in New Yrk City. He wrte her a letter intrducing himself and inviting her t crrespnd (通信). The next day he was shipped verseas fr military service.
During the next year and ne mnth, the tw begun t knw each ther by mail. Each letter was a seed falling n bth hearts. A rmance was budding. Blanchard asked fr a phtgraph, but she refused. She felt that if he really cared, it wuldn't matter what she lked like.
When the day finally came fr him t return frm Eurpe, they scheduled their first meeting — 7 pm at the Grand Central Statin in New Yrk. “Yu'll recgnize me,” she wrte. “By the red rse I'll wear my dress.” S at 7:00 he was in the statin lking fr a girl whse heart he lved, but whse face he'd never seen.
A yung lady was cming tward him. Her figure was lng and slim; her blnde hair lay back frm her ears; her eyes were blue as flwers; her lips and chin had a gentle firmness, and in her pale green suit she was like springtime cming alive. He went tward her, entirely frgetting t ntice that she was nt wearing a rse. As he mved, a middle aged wman whispered, “Ging my way, Sir?”
注意:1.所续写短文的词数应为150左右;
2.至少使用5个短文中标有下划线的关键词语;
3.续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好;
4.续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph 1:
Almst uncntrllably he made his way t the wman, and then he nticed that she was wearing a red rse.
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Paragraph 2:
The wman's face bradened int a big smile.
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翻译小练习:
约翰·布兰查德看到这个40多岁的女人很失望。
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2. 没错,她就是他等的那个女孩。
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3. 尽管他想跟着那位年轻的女士,他还是停下来,朝那位女士走去,向她打招呼,并拿出他在图书馆里找到的那本书。
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4. “我是约翰·布兰查德,你一定是霍利斯·梅内尔小姐。我非常高兴你能见到我,我可以请你吃饭吗?”
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5. “我不知道这是怎么回事,”她回答说,“但是刚才路过的那个穿着淡绿色西装的年轻女士求我把红玫瑰戴在我的外套上。
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6. 她说如果你要请我吃饭,我应该告诉你她在街对面的餐厅等你。她说这是个考验!”
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参考答案:
1.约翰·布兰查德看到这个40多岁的女人很失望。
Jhn Blanchard was disappinted t see the wman, wh was ver 40 years ld.
2. 没错,她就是他等的那个女孩。
Exactly, She was the girl he was waiting fr.
3. 尽管他想跟着那位年轻的女士,他还是停下来,朝那位女士走去,向她打招呼,并拿出他在图书馆里找到的那本书。
Thugh he wuld like t fllw the yung lady, he stpped and walked tward the wman, greeted her and held ut the bk he fund in the library.
4. “我是约翰·布兰查德,你一定是霍利斯·梅内尔小姐。我非常高兴你能见到我,我可以请你吃饭吗?”
“I'm Jhn Blanchard, and yu must be Miss Hllis Maynell. I am mre than glad yu culd meet me; may I take yu t dinner?”
5. “我不知道这是怎么回事,”她回答说,“但是刚才路过的那个穿着淡绿色西装的年轻女士求我把红玫瑰戴在我的外套上。
“I dn't knw what this is abut,”she answered, “but the yung lady in her pale green suit wh just went by begged me t wear the red rse n my cat.
6. 她说如果你要请我吃饭,我应该告诉你她在街对面的餐厅等你。她说这是个考验!”
And she said if yu were ging t invite me t dinner, I shuld tell yu that she is waiting fr yu in the restaurant acrss the street. She said it was a test!”
参考范文:
Paragraph 1:
Almst uncntrllably he made his way t the wman, and then he nticed that she was wearing a red rse. Jhn Blanchard was disappinted t see the wman, wh was ver 40 years ld. Exactly, She was the girl he was waiting fr. Thugh he wuld like t fllw the yung lady, he stpped and walked tward the wman, greeted her and held ut the bk he fund in the library. “I'm Jhn Blanchard, and yu must be Miss Hllis Maynell. I am mre than glad yu culd meet me; may I take yu t dinner?”
Paragraph 2:
The wman's face bradened int a big smile. “I dn't knw what this is abut,”she answered, “but the yung lady in her pale green suit wh just went by begged me t wear the red rse n my cat. And she said if yu were ging t invite me t dinner, I shuld tell yu that she is waiting fr yu in the restaurant acrss the street. She said it was a test!”
模拟训练02
读后续写 阅读下面短文,根据所给情节进行续写,使之构成一个完整的故事。
Ali and his yunger sister, Zahra, lived with their parents in a pr neighbrhd. Their mther was very sick and their father was struggling t find a jb, and they had nly a little mney with which t buy fd. As they had nt paid the rent fr several mnths, the landlrd was breathing dwn their necks.
One day, Ali tk Zahra’s shes t a she repairman t be fixed, but he lst them n the way hme. It wasn’t until he gt hme that he realized he had lst the shes. He was afraid that his parents wuld be angry and disappinted, s he begged his sister t keep it secret. Zahra agreed and the tw decided t share Ali’s running shes. Zahra’s schl hurs were in the mrning, s she wuld wear them first. After schl, she wuld rush back and give them t Ali. He culd then run t his schl, which began in the afternn. Althugh he ran as fast as he culd, Ali ften arrived late and was warned by the schl.
Ali heard abut a lng distance race that was held fr the bys in the city. When he learned that the third prize was a new pair f shes, he decided t take part. He ran hme excitedly and prmised his sister that he wuld win her the new shes.
The day f race arrived. Ali had a strng start, but halfway thrugh the race he began t get tired and his legs began t ache. Getting mre and mre exhausted he thught nly f Zahra and his prmise t her. Dreaming f the new shes he wuld win fr his sister gave him strength, and he stayed right behind the tw fastest runners, determined t finish third. Suddenly, as the finish line drew near, anther runner cllided (碰撞) with Ali frm behind and he crashed t the grund.
注意:
1. 所续写短文的词数应为150左右;
2. 应使用5个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语;
3. 续写部分分为两段,每段的开头语已为你写好;
4. 续写完成后,请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。
Paragraph 1:
Ali lked up and saw the ther bys rushing ahead. ______________________________________________________________________________________
Paragraph 2:
Filled with delight, Ali walked hme quickly.
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翻译小练习:
1. 在这一点上他拒绝放弃,他跳起来,尽可能快地跑。
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2. 他冲过终点线,得了四等奖。
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3. 想到他会让她妹妹失望,阿里忍不住抽泣起来。
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4. 就在这时,他突然听到广播里宣布他获得了三等奖,因为与阿里相撞的赛跑者因违反规定被取消资格。
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5. 在颁奖典礼上把鞋放在胸前,阿里感到欣喜若狂,如释重负因为他最终为妹妹赢得了这双鞋。
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6. 他迫不及待地想见到他的妹妹并分享这个令人激动的消息。
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7. 到达时,阿里发现萨拉在外面等着。
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8. 她真的很紧张她哥哥是否给她带来了她想要的东西。
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9. “萨拉,看看我给你带来了什么。”他用颤抖的双手从包里拿出奖品。
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10. 萨拉一看到鞋子,脸上就喜形于色。
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11. 她激动得向阿里扑了过去。 “谢谢你!”当兄妹紧紧拥抱在一起时,他们的眼睛里涌出喜悦的泪水。
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参考答案:
1. 在这一点上他拒绝放弃,他跳起来,尽可能快地跑。
Refusing t give up at this pint, he jumped t his feet and ran as fast as he culd.
2. 他冲过终点线,得了四等奖。
He dashed acrss the finish line and wn the furth prize.
3. 想到他会让她妹妹失望,阿里忍不住抽泣起来。
Thinking he wuld let her sister dwn, Ali culdn’t help sbbing.
4. 就在这时,他突然听到广播里宣布他获得了三等奖,因为与阿里相撞的赛跑者因违反规定被取消资格。
Just then he suddenly heard the annuncement frm the bradcast that he wn the third prize as the runner wh cllided with Ali was disqualified fr breaking the rule.
5. 在颁奖典礼上把鞋放在胸前,阿里感到欣喜若狂,如释重负因为他最终为妹妹赢得了这双鞋。
Hlding the shes clse t his chest during the award ceremny, Ali felt verjyed and relieved as he eventually wn the shes fr his sister.
6. 他迫不及待地想见到他的妹妹并分享这个令人激动的消息。
He culd nt wait t see his sister and share the thrilling news.
7. 到达时,阿里发现萨拉在外面等着。
On his arrival, Ali fund Zahra was waiting utside.
8. 她真的很紧张她哥哥是否给她带来了她想要的东西。
She was really nervus whether her brther had brught her what she was expecting.
9. “萨拉,看看我给你带来了什么。”他用颤抖的双手从包里拿出奖品。
“Zahra, see what I have gt fr yu.” he tk the prize ut f his bag with his trembling hands.
10. 萨拉一看到鞋子,脸上就喜形于色。
The instant Zahra saw the shes, her face lit up.
11. 她激动得向阿里扑了过去。 “谢谢你!”当兄妹紧紧拥抱在一起时,他们的眼睛里涌出喜悦的泪水。
S thrilled was she that she threw herself at Ali. “Thank yu! Ali.” Tears f jy welled up their eyes as the brther and sister hugged tightly tgether.
参考范文:
【参考答案】
1. One pssible versin:
Paragraph 1:
Ali lked up and saw the ther bys rushing ahead. Refusing t give up at this pint, he jumped t his feet and ran as fast as he culd. He dashed acrss the finish line and wn the furth prize. Thinking he wuld let her sister dwn, Ali culdn’t help sbbing. Just then he suddenly heard the annuncement frm the bradcast that he wn the third prize as the runner wh cllided with Ali was disqualified fr breaking the rule. Hlding the shes clse t his chest during the award ceremny, Ali felt verjyed and relieved as he eventually wn the shes fr his sister.
Paragraph 2:
Filled with delight, Ali walked hme quickly. He culd nt wait t see his sister and share the thrilling news. On his arrival, Ali fund Zahra was waiting utside. She was really nervus whether her brther had brught her what she was expecting. “Zahra, see what I have gt fr yu.” he tk the prize ut f his bag with his trembling hands. The instant Zahra saw the shes, her face lit up. S thrilled was she that she threw herself at Ali. “Thank yu! Ali.” Tears f jy welled up their eyes as the brther and sister hugged tightly tgether.Cnflict and Emtin:三冲突
Danger系列
和危险的动物
害怕、紧张:
Scared, nervus
和危险的环境
和危险的人
Quarrel系列
误解
失望、伤心、后悔、生气、困惑、害羞和尴尬:
Disappinted, sad, shy, embarrassed, regret, angry, cnfused
背叛
观念、性格、兴趣不一
伤害(自尊、信任等)
Frustratin系列
第一类:贫困、残疾、孤独(pr, disabled, lneliness)等
同情和伤心:
Sympathetic, sad
第二类:失败、骄傲或自卑(failure, nt cnfident / t prud)等
Slutin and Emtin:四途径
他人
譬如:善心和爱(lve, kindness),及时援助,安慰和鼓励,陪伴等
情节中:
1.镇定(calm)
2.鼓舞(encuraged)
3.不悦(dissatisfied)
结尾:
1. 欣慰、欢喜
(relieved, happy)
2. 感动、感恩(mved, grateful)
3. 希望、信心(hpeful, cnfident)
他物
譬如:河流,太阳等
自己
譬如:effrt, inspiratin
自然
突出和谐,时间与成长
卷别
Cnflict
Slutin
2020.7
拍摄北极熊遇险(浙江)
借助他物和他人:用辣椒喷雾器(文章有提示)暂退熊,然后救援队及时援助
情绪变化:害怕熊到暂时镇定,到脱险后的欢喜
卖爆米花方法救助穷人(山东)
借助他物和他人:一家决定和被救助孩子卖爆米花,路人纷纷购买
情绪变化:开始的同情到最后的开心与感恩
2020.1
大学生和宠物狗的离别
借助他物:父母买来小狗,孩子回家后,看到两只狗彼此陪伴和陪伴父母,明白道理
情绪变化:难过到欣慰
2018.6
父子骑马迷路
借助他人他物:先父亲安慰我,然后我们看到小河后寻路回家
情绪变化:害怕到镇定,最后到开心
2017.11
家庭旅游为野营争执
借助他物:用自己带的帐篷来野营露宿
情绪变化:不解困惑到最后开心
2017.6
骑车游玩遇狼脱险
借助他人他物:用辣椒喷雾器(文章有提示)暂退狼,然后路人甲及时援助
情绪变化:害怕到喜出望外,到害怕,最后开心
2016.10
夫妇森林旅游争执,女主人迷路
借助他人他物:想起丈夫曾经的爱后悔,找到一个地方先睡下,第二天跟着河水来到空地,救援队及时赶到
情绪变化:害怕 –》后悔—》开心
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