高考真题之读后续写03 2022年6月新高考卷•身残志坚的男孩
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阅读下面材料,根据其内容和所给段落开头语续写两段,使之构成一篇完整的短文。 It was the day f the big crss-cuntry run. Students frm seven different primary schls in and arund the small twn were warming up and walking the rute(路线)thrugh thick evergreen frest. I lked arund and finally sptted David, wh was standing by himself ff t the side by a fence. He was small fr ten years ld. His usual big tthy smile was absent tday. I walked ver and asked him why he wasn’t with the ther children. He hesitated and then said he had decided nt t run. What was wrng? He had wrked s hard fr this event! I quickly searched the crwd fr the schl’s cach and asked him what had happened. “I was afraid that kids frm ther schls wuld laugh at him,” he explained uncmfrtably. “I gave him the chice t run r nt, and let him decide.”
I bit back my frustratin(懊恼). I knew the cach meant well—he thught he was ding the right thing. After making sure that David culd run if he wanted, I turned t find him cming twards me, his small bdy rcking frm side t side as he swung his feet frward. David had a brain disease which prevented him frm walking r running like ther children, but at schl his classmates thught f him as a regular kid. He always participated t the best f his ability in whatever they were ding. That was why nne f the children thught it unusual that David had decided t jin the crss-cuntry team. It just tk him lnger—that’s all. David had nt missed a single practice, and althugh he always finished his run lng after the ther children, he did always finish. As a special educatin teacher at the schl, I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was prud f his strng determinatin.
注意:1. 续写词数应为150左右;2. 请按如下格式在答题卡的相应位置作答.We sat dwn next t each ther, but David wuldn’t lk at me.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________I watched as David mved up t the starting line with the ther runners.________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________
主要要素Main elements
人物main characters
schl’s cach
情节 main plts
P2: I lked arund and finally sptted David, wh was standing by himself ff t the side by a fence. He was small fr ten years ld. His usual big tthy smile was absent tday. I walked ver and asked him why he wasn’t with the ther children. He hesitated and then said he had decided nt t run. P3: What was wrng? He had wrked s hard fr this event! P4: I quickly searched the crwd fr the schl’s cach and asked him what had happened. “I was afraid that kids frm ther schls wuld laugh at him,” he explained uncmfrtably. “I gave him the chice t run r nt, and let him decide.”
情节一越野赛前,因教练怕患有脑疾的David被其他学校的学生嘲笑,善意询问,导致David犹豫不决,想要放弃。
情节二David 为了这次比赛做出了非常多的努力。
情节Main plts
P6: David had a brain disease which prevented him frm walking r running like ther children, but at schl his classmates thught f him as a regular kid. He always participated t the best f his ability in whatever they were ding. That was why nne f the children thught it unusual that David had decided t jin the crss-cuntry team. It just tk him lnger—that’s all. David had nt missed a single practice, and althugh he always finished his run lng after the ther children, he did always finish. As a special educatin teacher at the schl, I was familiar with the challenges David faced and was prud f his strng determinatin.
情节三即使David有脑疾,学校同学也一直把他当作正常孩子来对待,没人觉得他参加越野比赛是件不正常的事。
接情节二David 为了这次比赛做出了非常多的努力。作为一名特殊教育的老师,我对David强烈的意志力感到自豪,并不希望他就此放弃。
What’s the relatinship between this tw paragraphs?
David wanted t give up.
Tk part in theevent eventually.
冲突与高潮Cnflicts and climax
As his teacher, I did nt David give up.
I managed t persuade David t attend the event.
David’s classmates treated him nrmally.
They encuraged David and cheered up fr him.
线索Clues fr writing
1\ We sat dwn next t each ther, but David wuldn’t lk at me.2\ I watched as David mved up t the starting line with the ther runners.
词汇准备preparatin
行为动作类深呼吸:with a deep breath/breathe deeply坚持做:insisted n ding/be stick t ding垂下头:lwer ne’s head拍拍肩膀:tap sb. n his shulder
情绪类热情:enthusiastically /with great passin骄傲:be prud f/take pride in鼓舞:encuraging/full f psitive energy决心: make up ne’s mind/ determined
1、定语从句Yu have a full preparatin befre this event, which is the mst imprtant reasn why yu shw up here.2、with 的复合结构Thunderus applause brke ut, with the name David eching again and again. 3、强调句It was his brave heart and strng faith that culd make smething unusual happen finally.
虽然使用高级、多样的句式可以使阅卷老师眼前一亮,但也不能喧宾夺主,盲目使用,要量力而行。简单的句子也能写出生动的表达。
We sat dwn next t each ther, but David wuldn’t lk at me. I said gently and quietly, “N ne can change yur mind, except yurself. If yu desire t challenge yurself, there is nthing t d with thers’ thughts.” He sat still with a deep breath. “Yu have a full preparatin befre this event, which is the mst imprtant reasn why yu shw up here”, I added with a sincere tne. Hearing my wrds, David turned t me tremblingly with tears spilling ut f his eyes and expressed he had made a firm determinatin t finish the crss-cuntry run. His cach heard what David said and gave me a lk—the kind that was mre determined than anyne else’s.
I watched as David mved up t the starting line with the ther runners. The race started. It seemed that the runway was extremely lng fr yung children, nt t mentin a child with a brain disease. David insisted n running as if he had frgtten all his weaknesses, thugh he was tripped ver within the a few kilmeters. It didn’t take lng befre he picked himself up again and cntinued his missin. Classmates all appeared n the racing track, cheering fr him. “Cme n! Yu can make it! We are prud f yu!” they shuted enthusiastically. T everyne’s jy, he reached the final line and ranked the 20th. It was n mre imprtant whether he wn the first place r nt. It was his brave heart and strng faith that culd make smething unusual happen finally.
创造了丰富、合理的内容,富有逻辑性,续写完整,与原文清净融洽度高。
使用了多样且恰当的词汇和语法结构,语言错误少,且完全不影响理解。
自然有效的使用了段落间、句子间衔接手段,全文结构清晰,收尾呼应,意义连贯。
本文以赛跑为线索展开。作者是一名特殊教育教师,在大型越野赛跑那天,发现患有大脑疾病的大卫独自站在一旁。作者问其原因,他说准备放弃比赛。从教练口中得知,因为担心同学们会嘲笑大卫,所以教练想让大卫自己去决定是否参加赛跑。作者让大卫追寻自己的内心,不理会别人的看法,大卫最终参赛,尽管遇到困难,他战胜了自己,这已经无关名次,而是他的勇敢和坚定让这一切成为可能。
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